Qualities that good nannies should possess (in my humble opinion)
Each caretaker has a different "style," and I think it's important that the parent's and caretaker's styles are compatible. Some individuals value strict disciplining techniques while others subscribe to peaceful parenting practices. Religious families may want their children cared for by a member of the same religion while others may value a humanist perspective. I strongly believe that it's important to openly and honestly communicate about values, beliefs, and the child rearing styles that you believe in and why.
Here are things that I do, or qualities I have, that I think make me a good nanny:
- Being a good example: from not cursing around kids to the things I eat around kids, I know that everything I do is setting an example for the things they are learning to do. I set a good example by dressing appropriately, using manners and respect when talking to children, giving them my full attention when they are talking to me/interacting with me (not texting/looking at my phone when working with children), being patient and understanding, making sure my comments don't influence their beliefs/values, having a positive disposition and encouraging optimism
- Encouraging children to think: when children ask me questions, I seldom just give them an answer. I get children to think for themselves and find that, often, if you give a child a starting place they can find the answer they were looking for all by their selves. Not only is it fulfilling for the child to be able to solve problems by their self, the more you get children to think on their own the easier it is for them to do so. This way, children are more likely to form their own opinions on things and have an open mind.
- Encouraging children to learn: there are so many opportunities to learn in day-to-day life and I think it's our responsibility as adults to encourage children to learn at every opportunity they come across! We learn by asking questions about things, researching things that we don't know, studying subjects that are interesting to us, hearing other people's experiences, doing activities we aren't familiar with, along with countless others. I ask children about things they already know so I can get them to explain things to me and reinforce information that they have already been taught.
- Encouraging children to be independent: instead of doing things for children (which we will inadvertently do as caretakers anyway), I encourage them to do things for themselves (at age appropriate levels, of course) with my help so they can learn to be independent. I let kids help me cook, clean, and tidy so they can learn how to do it on their own. I will give them a verbal reminder and/or visual demonstration if they can't remember the steps involved in doing something. Charts, checklists, and reward systems work well with helping children learn and complete tasks. Gaining a feeling of independence helps children to feel more confident and secure.
- Encouraging physical and emotional health: encourage physical health by making sure children get nutritious meals and learn which foods are and aren't good for them, teaching good hygiene by supervising/helping with hygiene routines (brushing teeth/bathing/washing hands) and providing a good example of being hygienic in day-to-day life (washing hands, sanitizing/wiping down surfaces/disposing of trash properly, cleaning up after oneself), encouraging physical activity and explaining why physical activity is essential for good health, teaching children to talk to adults about their problems/concerns/emotions, or to express them in some way (writing, art, music, sports), teaching children that they can confide in parents or caretakers for advice, answers, protection, consoling, and meeting their physical needs.
- Discouraging stereotypes: I discourage children from using stereotypes for multiple reasons. (1) Because they are offensive; when you stereotype someone, you are basing your opinion of a whole group of people off of what is actually your opinion of either one or a few of "that type" of person. I try to teach children this and help them to not associate stereotypes with actual people, and not to form their own stereotypes of groups of people. (2) Another reason I try to discourage stereotypes is because there are a lot of them in most children's books. Girls are weak princesses who need to be rescued by a prince, and princes are always strong and manly and hate pink. By discouraging these stereotypes, it helps children feel like it's okay if they're a girl and would rather play with BeyBlades instead of Barbies, and vice versa. I think it's important to teach children that while it may seem like there are "boy things" and "girl things" (or gender specific activities/opinions), it's totally cool to do anything that makes you happy (as long as it is legal and moral and all that good stuff :).
- Encouraging good manners & respect: the biggest way I encourage manners and respect is by showing manners and respect to the children I am taking care of. Of course, if they forget to say "please" or "thank you" I remind them, but I always make sure to use my manners and say these things to the children I am caring for. I think that when adults respect children, children are more likely to not only respect adults in return, but that children want to respect adults who show them respect.
- Encouraging good communication: when children are frustrated, usually it's because the child either didn't know how to communicate their needs/wants or is trying to communicate their needs/wants and is ineffective. Whether it's working on language development/signing with babies and young children, or working on expressing emotions/frustrations with older children, I always stress how important it is to communicate with others. The more children can communicate with each other and with adults, the more they can solve their own problems, and the closer they are to becoming independent.
